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In many areas, I crave consistency. I like when the subway comes on time and how my hair will be reliably perfect on the third day since my last wash. Sometimes the lighting is dim or the camera lens on my phone is dirty. Other times, I can't convince my face and body to do something sexy at the same time.

The result is always a weirdly cropped, uncomfortable-looking photo that I'd rather delete than send to anyone else. And that sort of defeats the purpose of a nude selfie—at least, the ones I'm taking.

Instead of continuing to suffer from my chronic inability to take a hot nude, I turned to the experts: three New York City-area boudoir photographers who set, light, and shoot sexy photos as their actual jobs. Then I did an IRL boudoir shoot with one of them. Their first lesson: Mood matters, as much as any pose or facial expression. This shocked me. No longer. Their second lesson: When it comes to poses and facial expressions, less is more.

The same goes for posing. Beskin told me that some of the most beautiful boudoir shots are those that capture natural, imperfect moments—because they capture the kind of authentic intimacy you share with your partner on a regular basis. To prepare for my professional photoshoot, I made a moodboard—something Mednik had suggested in our interview. Laugh away, but the moodboard helped me figure out what I wanted my nudes to look like.

It also helped me find photo inspiration, see what poses I liked, and compile lingerie I was into. For the record, I would've happily included an image of my moodboard it's mostly butt photos, because apparently I'm a huge fan of derrieres , but photo rights issues prevent me from doing so. So you'll just have to imagine all the sexy boudoir butt pics that inspired my shoot. Clothed nude photos?! An oxymoron of the highest order! But all three photographers assured me clothed—or like, partially clothed—photos were standard in boudoir.

Since going full birthday suit can be a little awkward, they recommended I start with a more covered-up look say, my partner's button-down or a cozy sweater over my favorite bra and gradually strip down to my skivvies.

Beskin even suggested I select my outfits ahead of time and lay them out in the order I plan to wear them. She warned that corsets and other tight garments can leave marks on the skin, so I should wear those last. I brought a couple bras, three pairs of underwear, a bodysuit, and a button-down with me to the shoot, and Ribinik helped me assemble looks from there. And I got some pretty dramatic hair and makeup done for the occasion.

This gives clients a second to get in the zone before, you know, taking their clothes off. And the photographers suggested I incorporate something similar— hair and makeup , sexy music, a glass or two of wine —into my own nude selfie shoots.

I don't have much of a problem being naked around people just ask my poor, poor roommates , but even I thought this period of mental preparation sounded like a good idea. On set, Ribinik opted for a Lana Del Rey -based soundtrack, and her makeup artist took her time making me look picture-perfect. I ended up looking like a straight-up doll—a look I appreciated for the professional shoot but would never have the patience or skill to recreate on my own.

Then I did the whole nude and semi-nude modeling thing. And honestly, it was easier than I expected. While Ribinik's makeup artist worked her magic, Ribinik walked me through the fundamentals of boudoir scenery—which is basically just that you want to pose in a clean, well-lit, ideally luxurious-looking room. The swanky Manhattan hotel room we were shooting in seemed to fit the bill. Though it was raining out, she explained she'd be keeping the lights off.

Apparently, natural light—even if it's dim—is better than artificial light, because it can lend a soft, sensual vibe to your photos. Ribinik recommended posing in a window-filled room, like the one we were in, whenever possible.

Before I knew it, my two hours of get-to-know-you talk were up, and it was time to get naked. Thankfully, Ribinik knew what she wanted from each shot, and she confidently directed me from pose to pose—telling me where to put my arms, how to tilt my head, and when to really push my butt out.

I'd usually take my nudes on my bed or in my bathroom, but Ribinik made use of everything from the couch to the wall. I quickly realized how easy it can be to get creative with posing and scenery, and I tried to make mental notes of everything I was experiencing. Before long, the moment of truth arrived: Would this effort I exerted to educate myself on how to take hot nudes actually result in hotter nudes? My first move was to revisit the photos from my shoot with Ribinik and to recreate some of the poses on my own see my attempts below, complete with fun names from yours truly.

I also drew inspiration from my moodboard, though that mostly helped me get in the nude photo taking mood. When it came to doing, well, pretty much anything else the photographers had taught me to do, I failed.

The monster that is laziness reared its ugly head, and I paid little attention to lighting, scenery, or getting in The Zone. I took my nudes at night, so natural light wasn't an option. I compromised and positioned myself near some not-so-natural light sources—namely, lamps. This mostly sufficed. I also failed to clean my room before the shoot, which is downright embarrassing.

I am adult enough to understand the import of a clean living space, and I'm also adult enough to understand that a vacuum cleaner does not add value to any nude photo. Apparently, though, I'm not adult enough to act on either of these notions. Oh, and let the record show I have zero idea how to use my cell phone's self-timer function, and I'm way too lazy to figure it out.

Selfies—awkward posing and all—are my bread and butter. So rather than aiming for perfect replicas of my boudoir photos, I adapted them as best I could.

Now for the good stuff. This is the first pose Ribinik had me do in our shoot. I'm not the kind of person who does planks!! Revel in this moment, because the only reason I'd ever subject myself to this is for the art of the nude. This is one of my favorite selfies from my DIY experiment—I actually like it more than the professional shot. Bonus: My body is largely hidden from the shot, so the only thing I had to control was my face. Ribinik told me she often instructs clients to avoid eye contact with the camera at the start of her shoots.

Instead, she asks them to look down, glance into the distance, or tilt their heads back with their eyes closed sound familiar? Staring down a camera lens can be intimidating, and this helps people adjust to the environment. This is hands-down my favorite photo from my shoot with Ribinik. A quick tip: In our interview, Mednik recommended I highlight the curves of my body by arching my back, popping my hip, or pushing my butt out.

And I'm doing exactly that in this photo. It felt a little awkward, but it definitely paid off. I tried to recreate this one at home, but once again, my arm failed me. So I adapted the pose and took a mirror selfie, instead. I generally like the way the shot turned out. But I forgot to shut my closet door before snapping the pic, which put a damper on the final product.

This one is just. Plus, all I had to do was lie on a bed and look down—my kinda pose. OK, so I had to modify the original with this one. There was no way in hell I could get my face, full body, and both arms in a selfie. And as you can see from the slight blurriness, I had trouble stabilizing the camera even after the modification. Let me tell ya, simultaneously stretching your arm, art-directing your image, and focusing your lens is no small task.

All I had to do was lie down, keep my face out of the shot, attempt to snap a full-body picture, and voila—sexy photo. Pro-tip: If your face is doing weird shit, just crop it out.

This one was so easy to pose for. I just touched my lip! That was it! Plus, I really like the way it turned out. Somehow this was impossible. Such a bummer. Also worth noting: Ribinik told me a lot of people tend to hold tension in their lips. I didn't realize how real this was until I was in a high-stress well, as high-stress as a DIY nude photo shoot can get environment trying to take a photo with my mouth in it.

I thought back to something she'd said to me both in our interview and on-set: "Keep your lips slightly parted, and breathe through your mouth. Let's be real, guys. Figuring out what the hell to do with your arms in a nude photo is no small task. Do you saucily plant your hands on your hips? Do you leave your arms dangling by your sides? My gurus had a couple thoughts. Mednik told me I could use them to conceal parts of my body, revealing my form little by little—photo by photo.

Ribinik took a different approach. She had me pose with my elbows up, which was way more interesting than anything I could've come up with on my own.

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If you're new here, you may want to get my discreet newsletter to learn how to make him sexually obsessed with you and only you. Click here to get it. It's free. It's discreet. So you want to take a sexy selfie. It can also help increase your self-confidence. Side Note: I put together this in-depth assesment that will uncover just how good you are at giving oral sex and satisfying your man.

It may uncover some uncomfortable truths, or you may discover that you are already a queen at giving blow jobs. Your sexy selfie can become part of a fun and flirty text game.

In fact, if you give your man just a glimpse at your bra or underwear underneath, it can be super effective. Just pop a few buttons on that business attire or slide up your skirt!

You have tons of options to work with. Your favorite pushup bra can provide the perfect boost, too. Footwear pairs perfectly with stockings, too. If you want to give your man back-arching, toe-curling, screaming orgasms that will keep him sexually obsessed with you, then you can learn these sex techniques in my private and discreet newsletter.

You'll also learn the 5 dangerous mistakes that will ruin your sex life and relationship. Get it here. Consider lingerie, too. Check out this post to find our 10 tips for choosing flattering lingerie. It will definitely drive your man crazy! You might be surprised how sexy things in your wardrobe can be.

Remember not to hide your body. Yes, this is all about makeup. It might be some sparkly earrings or a white scarf, but it brightens up your face. Plus, holding on to a prop tends to relax your body and create a more natural pose. There are so many options when it comes to props. Place a pillow to cover your nudity. A banana or lollipop might be cliche, but it can also be sexy as hell.

Read more about flogging and spanking in this post. Read : How to make a long-distance relationship work. There are so many ways to take a selfie that will boost your confidence and make your man drool! Angles are incredibly important. Not all photos have to be straight on.

You can take it from the side, from above, from below or from behind. You could even take a photo from behind you as you look in a mirror. Capturing your reflection shows two angles! Practice framing the body parts you love and try to capture the reason you love them before taking a selfie and sending it off to your man. This will come through in your photo. Hint: think of something funny as you press the shutter button. The classic red carpet pose involves placing one hand on your hip, turn your body away from the camera and look back over your shoulder.

This will be flattering for both your face and body! If you prefer lying on your back, lean your heels against the wall to elongate your legs. Your hair can splay out around you, or you can bend your neck over the edge of a piece of furniture and smile at the camera in your upside down pose! Posture also helps when you take a selfie. This pulls your shoulders back while simultaneously pushing your chest out. For a more boudoir photo, arch your back seductively.

You can also show off shoes or boots with a similar pose. Pull your knees to your chest to make footwear the focus of your photo. Reach toward your shoulders to give your hands something to do when standing up in photos. You can also play with your hair. Make eye contact with the camera. Learn how eye contact is a sizzling blowjob technique , too!

Remember that even the most gorgeous woman can look awkward or unattractive with the wrong pose. Think of those double-chin pictures. This unflattering image is a result of looking down toward your camera. Look straight on or above, which also allows you to show off you bosom. To highlight your jaw, push your face outward a bit. You can also tilt your chin down as you do this.

Looking sideways or backward over your shoulder is a great way to flatter your face, especially when smiling! Fortunately, modern cameras include a countdown mode, and a front-facing camera makes taking selfies incredibly easy! Set your camera on a steady surface before taking a photo.

If you use your phone to take a selfie, a case with kickstand can be useful. Professional photographers often bring a mobile light source with them, even when the sun is bright overhead. There are a number of ways you can play with light when taking a sexy selfie. Try taking your photo at different times of day. Natural light is almost always flattering to the subject of a photo! Lean against a window or sit on the seat while the light washes in around you.

See how your photos look in different rooms, which will have different types of light and brightness. Move so that your light source is in front of you or behind you. You can get extra creative and incorporate soft candle light or even a string of decorative lights. Vary the type of light that brightens your selfies for more interesting images.

Get more tips to feel comfortable when riding your man. Finally, be wary of flash. A filter that brightens up a cloudy day or makes colors pop more than your camera was able to capture when taking selfies is okay. Your camera probably has an option to shoot in sepia or black and white, which can create a cool, artistic effect. Your sexy selfies can be something you take on the fly before you go out to the club because you know you look good, or they may be something you put a little planning and effort into.

No one expects you to take professional-quality photos, but you can take a really stunning photo with the right outfit, props and tools.

Learn how to cure sexual anxiety once and for all here. Related : How to flirt over text. Beware that he might send a dick pic back. Learn why guys do this. I put together this in-depth, step-by-step instructional video that will teach you how to make your man sexually addicted to you and only you.

It contains a number of oral sex techniques that will give your man full-body, shaking orgasms. If you're interested in learning these techniques to keep your man addicted and deeply devoted to you as well as having a lot more fun in the bedroom, then you may want to check out the video. You can watch it by clicking here. I love to dress up in lingerie, sending my husband sexy pictures, surprising him with a bj, initiating sex, dressing up in sexy costumes giving him massage, showering him, trying new things, etc.

He seems to love it, but I sometimes feel I am too much and how to keep it up if I always do it though I looooovvee to do it. How often would you advice doing these things? Do it as much as you want to do it and feel comfortable doing it. I always take the worst pictures and do not feel like I can take sexy pictures.

But really appreciate all the good advice.. Talk to him. This guide on sexual communication should help. Your email address will not be published. Comments I love to dress up in lingerie, sending my husband sexy pictures, surprising him with a bj, initiating sex, dressing up in sexy costumes giving him massage, showering him, trying new things, etc.

Ughh i do all this stuff and my husband has no intetest in sex. I dont know what to do. Leave a Reply Cancel reply Your email address will not be published. Read First: BJ Overview 2.

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