My dad disowned me after I had an argument with his wife which ended with her asking my dad to pick between us and he chose her. My uncle disowned his son my cousin when he was around 2. He did so because the marriage ended and to avoid his ex wife, he stopped seeing his son all together. My uncle got remarried and has 3 more sons. He shaped up real quick though because my grandma called him from our home country and ripped him a new one for being a racist.
Not because he tried pfegnant kill himself. I get what you are saying about having no support or guidance. Is pregjant anything that your children can do that would make you not want anything to do with them? The family adopted two brothers from Russia. In March Babies Advice. Would you? Lol of course not. She punched her adult daughter Sister pregnant disown my brother's memorial rodeo for waving at her little sister. But we build these stories in the absence of real feedback. My family has also disowned me.
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Some people in my family are pretty dysfunctional and don't deal with other family members. One cousin doesn't even acknowledge her own mother, Ive literally seen her walk right past her. This made me wonder what could drive me to this point. I honestly can't come up with much that would make me not want anything to do with my mother or children.
I don't really deal with my father but it's because he's an alcoholic and Its hurtful to watch him ruin his life or possibly kill himself. So I guess for me you can say self destructive behavior will cause me to keep my distance. At the same time, if he decided to clean up I'd welcome him with open arms and when I see him I definitely speak to him. Is there anything that your children can do that would make you not want anything to do with them?
How about parents and other family members? Could you accept certain behaviors from children that would cause you to disown another family member?
For example, stealing from you. I can imagine a lot of things that would make a person better off if they cut all ties with technically related but not supportive family members: history of abuse and especially attempting to blame the victim for the abuse, a pattern of deliberate emotional abuse directed at you or your immediate family, threats towards your current children, attempts to break up your marriage I'm sure there are many more.
I don't know because I haven't been in a situation like that yet but a patient just cut off her mom. Her mom gave her husband chlamydia. It took me a while to wrap my head around it. Hooray for my professional perfect straight face. It just seems almost impossible for my mother to do something like that.
My sister disowned me because I got pregnant. That's the reason she gave my parents anyway. She's never spoken to me about it, she just dropped me without a goodbye. She hates kids that much. I don't know if I could disown my kids. If they were really terrible I could see having a limited relationship, but disowning seems unthinkable.
Any other family is fair game I suppose, but they would have to be severely toxic. Would you? You'd let an adult abuse your kids and keep in contact with them just because the adult was your parent or grandparent? My father and I didn't speak for about 3 years until I had my first born and I began to include him in anything that involves my babies. He and I still didn't speak other than an invite to a bday party or him asking for pics of the kids.
The most recent update we were fixing our relationship and working on repairing it. My father unexpectedly passed away in July and I love with the regret of wasting all those years 6 years total of us not really speaking. We were repairing and doing well but I will forever live with guilt. I lost my dad because we were too stubborn for our own good. Nothing can fix that. Lol of course not. I must've misunderstood your post.
I thought you said that if relatives would do something like that your immediate family its grounds for disowning. I consider children, spouse, parents, and grandparents to be immediate family. So my question to you was what behavior would cause you to disown your own children or parents? She's 30 and still acts like she's in high school. Mom and dad don't support her being in a highly dysfunctional relationship with a low life guy, so she cut her parents out of her life and acts like all the problems in her world are because of them.
I'm sure there are legit reasons to cut ties- abuse, violence or threats of it, neglect, but she's just a dumb low class chick and I feel terrible for her mom and sister.
I have family members I am better off without. I avoid people I believe will negatively impact my kids - family or not. I've finally come to the decision to cut my mother out of my life.
She lost her mind 6 years ago when she walked out on my dad after she'd had an affair. She went from prim and proper to boob job biker chick. She also became emotionally abusive, disowning my sister for saying she needed time and trying to keep me around because I had the grandkids. The emails she sent my sister were atrocious and I stood up for my sister and yet she wouldn't disown me. She goes back and forth with hate and love emails and has become a borderline stalker, for my own mental health I am done.
This has taught me to be a better person and parent. I would stand by my children even if they made poor choices. I'd let them know I disapproved but I would never stop loving them. I also don't fingers crossed! I cut my aunt out of my life. This was all because she posted a picture of us in a bikini top. My aunt called the city to report her for underage drinking. She also called her boss and got reported for harassment.
She was never drinking. She put a picture of my brother in my dad's coffin but didn't put a pic of me. She refused to attend my dad's funeral, because I was going to be in the family car.
She punched her adult daughter at my brother's memorial rodeo for waving at her little sister. She pulled a gun on my uncle. I could go on and on. No one in my family speaks to her except my grandma. My maternal grandparents disowned their son my uncle.
He is a drug addict and a pathological liar. After numerous cycles of asking my grandparents for financial help and blowing through tens of thousands of dollars, they wrote him out of the will and cut off all contact. He has tried to contact my mom and his other sister, but they along with the rest of the extended family refuse to return his contact.
He only ever wants money and he has threatened all of us with physical violence over this before. He's in his sixties now, continuing this pattern of self destruction, which is unfortunate. I know it tore my grandmother apart having to do this. She hates it but she also says that he has hurt her and my late grandfather so deeply that it had to be done. My brother has bipolar disorder. He refuses help or medication, other than pot.
In the last 15 years he has stolen money from my parents, sold drugs from their house which in turn had their house raided by the cops, grew pot in their backyard, he yelled, screamed and was aggressive towards all members of the family. He has hit every girl he's every dated, ended up in prison for domestic violence.
He threatened my daughter and I, told me he would one day tell my kids all the bad things I've done which is nothing and would ruin my relationship with them. When my dad had a stroke and he was the only able bodied person to help he sat around and watched my 65 year old mom, autistic brother and myself pregnant at the time lift and care for my dad.
In my eyes, he's done. I will never embrace him back into my life. I do not believe he can change or get better. He is a manipulative and incredibly selfish individual. He has left a path of destruction too long to fix. I wish I could get my mom to disconnect from him as well because he is causing her serious health issues. I understand that he is her son and she doesn't want to give up hope on him but if he continues to involve her in his messes he will kill her.
And if, God forbid, that does happen I will unleash holy hell on him. Both of my parents are cut off from me and my family and have been since I have been They are terrible people who should have never had children. I say that as one of the children and I have told them that to their face. They are emotionally abusive drug addicts. My mom held it together for a long time but lost it when I turned Unfortunately that meant my younger siblings dealt with the majority of the abuse.
My youngest brother tried to commit suicide when he was 15 by taking a bunch of her pills. She made him puke them all up and freaked out. Because he took her pills. Not because he tried to kill himself. She is out of 3 of her 4 children's life, which happens to be the children who have kids of their own. We all recognize that she is too volatile and too deep into her addictions for us to ever want our children around her.
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My dad disowned me after I had an argument with his wife which ended with her asking my dad to pick between us and he chose her. My uncle disowned his son my cousin when he was around 2. He did so because the marriage ended and to avoid his ex wife, he stopped seeing his son all together.
My uncle got remarried and has 3 more sons. He shaped up real quick though because my grandma called him from our home country and ripped him a new one for being a racist. The family adopted two brothers from Russia. The oldest brother got involved with drugs and was knifed and killed during a drug deal gone bad. The younger brother also got into drugs, and started stealing to support his habit. After trying several treatment programs, the parents finally kicked him out. The heartbreaking part of the story for me was that he apparently lived behind his house, in his old playhouse, for several weeks.
She went to her church group meeting and told the ladies what had transpired expecting them all the support her decision or something and I guess she was chastised for over an hour. I got a phone call that night first from the head of the church group offering me a place to stay and then my mother called and told me to come home right away. When he was 23 my son confessed to me that he was a Neo-Nazi. He kept his beliefs to himself, and of course I accepted that without any issue.
After not having seen him for a few years, I ran into my son randomly in the street one day. He was 27 at that time. Shaved his head, swastika on his temple and an eagle on his bicep, holding a sign and shouting in protest together with a bunch of others, all sporting the same stereotype look. I did not bail him out, and I do not care for what he is doing with his life.
As long as he continues living as he does, I want nothing to do with him. Should he turn around, contact me, and convince me that he regrets his action, I will have no problem accepting him as my son again, and pretending like nothing ever happened. My in-laws disowned my husband because he was doing an apprenticeship with a tattoo artist. My parents disowned my step-sister. I had stopped acknowledging her long before.
She stole from them often, money and jewelry mostly. She had some kids, all of which were failing in school and were at least two years behind where they should have been. So my parents took them and raised them. Step-sister freaked out and accused my parents of abuse and called the police. That was the last straw for my parents.
They had to meet with the police and the police had to meet with the rest of the grandchildren and children and of course we all said there was no abuse. My parents took a lot of crap from her, but when she attacked their integrity they were done caring about her. I was disowned at 14 by my grandmother who raised me. My grandmother and me had an argument one day and she told me to leave, so I did. I spent the next four years living on the streets, on friends couches or in shitty little apartments I managed to rent.
I was disowned by my mother. I got pregnant when I was 16 and she got mad when I told her that I would not be getting an abortion. The day my beautiful son was born, she tried to come to the hospital, but I was told she made a scene when she learned that I had asked the hospital not to let her visit me.
My grandmother disowned my father at least once. The issue was that it was barbaric that my father had chosen to have 4 kids instead of the proper 2 or 1. This was on top of the already festering issue that my Jewish father had married a shiksa my Catholic mother, who my grandmother blamed for the inappropriate number of grandchildren.
My mom disowned me because she hated the guy I started dating as a teenager. But I only dated him because he was the first warm body to come along and offer to get me away from her screaming crazy household. I went about my business, moved miles away, followed my little dreams and 2 years later she came crawling back asking forgiveness. This was over 25 years ago. I got that going for me…which is nice.
I disowned my dad when I was He had heavy drug use and turned into a violent person. Visitation with him was pointless since he was never home and i stayed with his parents. So I stopped showing up. He eventually died from a car accident a few years later, so I regret never speaking to him again.
I was away at a church retreat when my dad had a heart attack. I go to visit him the following weekend my parents are divorced and he has visitation rights on the weekend and practically all the men on his side of the family are at the house.
Uncle then tells me that he will personally make sure I never get a dime from when my dad dies because according to him, the only reason I ever visit my dad is because I am a gold digging daughter.
That was when I realized that that my uncle despised me. He honest to got hated me and as soon as I turned 18 I never saw my dad or his family ever again. Over the past year my mum has effectively disowned my sister because she finally got up the courage to tell the police that my brother molested her when she was a child. Yeah, reread that. She now keeps her 27 year old son at home in the knowledge that none of her other 5 children will ever go there again.
A year from now those two will only have each other. People are crazy. I was a child that disowned her grandparents. My grandparents disowned my uncle one of their six children because he brutally raped and molested his 12 and 10 year old daughters.
Most of the family then welcomed him back with open arms, including his wife. I am not in contact with any of my family members. Turns out I have a bunch of half-siblings out there, but they want nothing to do with me because my father cheated on his wife with my mother.
Only briefly. My son decided 2 years in to switch his major from mechanical engineering to business. This meant he would lose part of his scholarship and he would no longer be able to participate in the Co-op program. He decided against the business degree and to proceed with a math degree instead. He told us he was gay. We believed it was immoral, but he defied us.
He was kicked out 3 years ago. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. You may unsubscribe at any time. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. Found on AskReddit. More From Thought Catalog. Get our newsletter every Friday! You're in! Follow Thought Catalog. Post to Cancel.